Slow Parenting
TO MY GROWN UP CHILD
Beautiful, poignant & too often true poem I was touched by the other day.
My hands were busy through the day.
I didn’t have much time to play
the little games you asked me to.
I didn’t have much time for you.
I’d wash your clothes;
I’d sew and cook,
But when you’d bring me your picture book
and ask me to share your fun,
I’d say, “Later, we’ll have time for fun.”
I’d tuck you in all safe at night
and hear your prayers, turn out the light,
Then I’d tiptoe softly to the door…
I wish I’d stayed a minute more.
For life is short, the years rush past…
A little child grows up so fast.
No longer is your child at your side,
No more precious secrets to confide;
The picture books are put away.
There are no longer games to play,
No good night kiss, no prayers to hear…
That all belongs to yesteryear.
My hands, once busy, now are still.
The days are long and hard to fill.
I wish I could go back and do
the little things you asked me to.
Anon
PLAY FOR LITERACY
Today is Family Literacy Day in Canada. This year the focus is on learning through play….right up our alley don’t you think! Here’s an article Joan and I wrote for Babyvibe.
Thursday, Jan. 27, is family literacy day in Canada. According to ABC Life Literacy Canada, this year’s focus is on learning through play.
There are two reasons that play is such a powerful learning tool. Children are meant to learn through play. Think about all the important life lessons that your children have learned through play. In addition, play is a great way to take the pressure off and make something dry (or boring) entertaining, if you don’t believe me – put on some great tunes and dance your way through doing the dishes tonight, we suspect you’ll notice quite a difference.
Here are 10 really simple and fun reading and writing games to play at home with your children:
- For children who are learning the alphabet, making letters out of play dough is a fun and tactile way to experience the alphabet.
- In the car, simple games like “I-Spy” are great for practicing letter sounds and entertaining young minds while you are navigating rush hour.
- Create a family play night. Have your children write a short play, give everyone a part, have fun dressing up and put on a performance in your own home.
- Setting up a treasure hunt is a game that you can adjust to work with almost any age. Set it up yourself to practice reading or have your child set it up for you to have them practice writing the clues. At the simplest level, use one word like “oven” on the clues.
- Children love to put on a performance, so next time, have them create an entire show to present to you. Writing out programs and creating tickets are just some of the sneaky ways that writing works itself into this idea.
- When reading stories to young pre-readers, have them guess what they think will happen next before turning the page. This simple game engages children in the story and helps build their imagination and curiosity, which are vital in building the desire to learn to read in children.
- Involve your child in the weekly grocery shop. Make a list for you and give your child items for him to write on his list too. When you are at the store let him be in charge of finding the items on his list.
- Another fun letter game to entertain children in the car is to make funny phrases out of the letters on car license plates that you pass. For example “ALA 168” could be “Angry Little Aardvarks.”
- A really fun writing activity (which can also tie into the next activity) is to have your children run a restaurant for the night or for lunch. They are the servers and they set and write the menus. They can help prepare the food and even provide entertainment. This is a really great rainy day activity.
- Without a doubt, our favourite reading activity is cooking. Find simple recipes for early readers to follow. Casseroles with lots of ingredients are great for more advanced readers. Cooking also sneaks in some math skills and at the end of the day you have a child who can cook for you! For young ones, putting raisins on gingerbread men help with fine motor movement and finger dexterity.
THE RULES OF THE PLAYGROUND
In a recent study published by the UBC think tank – HELP (Human Early Learning Partnership) experts are now calling for a freshly “old school” approach to playground design. In recent years due to a movement towards making playgrounds safe we have been removing nature from the playground and replacing it with manmade materials making an environment that is not developmentally stimulating for children.
The study followed the play habits preschoolers and toddlers over 5 years and found that 87 percent of the time children don’t play with equipment provided and when the children did play with the equipment they didn’t play with it “in its intended purpose.”
The study concluded that the equipment “lacked challenge” and that children are drawn to natural materials like mud and trees in lieu of the multi coloured plastic megaliths that we are erecting as playgrounds.
Is it me, or is this another study telling us things we already know? Is it a newsflash to any parent out there that kids like digging in the mud?
First of all, let’s address the fact that children aren’t playing with the equipment for its intended purpose. Frankly this is a good thing, this means that children are using their imaginations, creating their own worlds using their curiosity and abilities to learn more about their surroundings. As parents we see our children using imaginary play all the time. The playground is a great place for children to create new worlds and play as they see fit.
Let’s look at the other issue here. Frankly, if kids want to play in the playground then that’s great; If they want to play in the mud, bushes and grass then that’s great. I think most parents are with me on this, I doubt that there are many parents out there who would force their children to stay within the bounds of playgrounds. Most playgrounds are in parks and so are surrounded by nature any ways, so an idea could be to plan to spend 50% of your time in the playground and 50% of your time available playing in the park.
I do agree with the study, in that we have over-safety proofed our playgrounds. Where have all those high slides of my childhood gone? Children learn so much from meeting physical challenges at play. I agree that more nature is better in the play environment. Hopefully from this study, some really fun, natural play spaces will emerge in a park near you!
SLOW PARENTING
I’m very pregnant right now and have been reading a lot about slow birthing on Jacquie Munroe’s Blog and it has made me think a lot about slow parenting and the slow movement in general.
We’ve heard it all before “life’s too busy, we need to slow down and smell the roses.” We all agree, but we just find it hard to find the time to slow down. Speaking as a typical A-type personality I certainly didn’t have the time to slow down until pregnancy forced it upon me. But here I am and I have been thinking a lot about “Slow Parenting”
So what is Slow Parenting?
Slow Parenting is about trusting that your child is the best person to be in charge of their own development. By that I mean trusting that your child will explore and develop at the pace that is right for them. Slow Parenting allows children to engage in creative play with what ever is to hand (cardboard boxes, dolls, climbing frames etc) instead of filling the child’s schedule with organised sports, music lessons and dance classes. Sure these things are great, just every thing in moderation as every one needs down time.
Slow Parenting is about really spending time with your kids, it could be as simple as making an extra special dinner together or you could have fun playing some games together. See my website for learning games that you can play with your child.
If you’re like me, you probably agree that this is a great idea but wonder where you will find the time for all this. That’s ok, you don’t need to be an Uber Slow Parent overnight. Try one thing and see if it works for you and your child, then try another. There’s no need to rush into Slow Parenting.